Forbidden Love, Hidden Secrets
by animeme220
Summary: Hinata has her secrets. So what happens when the love of her life finds out her two biggest ones? NejiHina, from Hinata's point of view.
1. Secrets Revealed

ok, so this is a first chapter of a nejihina story someone asked me to do. don't ask where the hell i got the plot from...random whatever.. ah well, hope you enjoy this story. please comment, though, even if it suks.

* * *

I stood on the porch, the night close around me. A breeze played with my dark blue hair, my pajamas too tight to flap in the light wind. My arms stung as the cold bit into them, numerous cuts and scars stinging, sending jolts of pleasure running up and down my spine.

I did not notice the flash of eyes from inside the house, nor the soft click before the door was silently opened and closed, and he stepped outside with me.

"Hinata," said a calm voice, deep, a voice one could loose themselves in, as he joined me next to the railing. Quickly, I folded my arms, hiding my secret. "Why are you out here?" he continued.

"N-n-neji..," I stuttered, as i tried not to think about what would happen if he saw my wrists. "I-.i couldn't sl-sleep."

He nodded, his long, dark hair bobbing in tune with his head, and all was silent while we stared at the darkness.

After a few minutes, he asked "How was the mission?"

"It was nice. You should have been there," I almost stopped, but the darkness gave me courage. "Why are you so serious? You should laugh. Seriously. I mean, whenever you come up in the parents conversations, they always wonder why you are so uptight." The sentences came out rushed; if it was light, one might have been able to see a faint blush as I thought of the possible repercussions from bringing up what some might consider a delicate topic.

"Oh, so the parents talk about me a lot?" he replied, a small smiling tugging at his lips. And a small smile played at my lips as i thought of the irony of the conversation and his joke.

"N-no! I- i didn't mean it...like that! I'm sorry.. but I am trying to make a point here. I mean, the only times I have ever seen you go out is with your team to either train or go for missions. I don't want you to end up like m-" I stuttered, the sentence seeming to fade into the night itself as i realize i had just said those words aloud. Neji's face showed an amazed confusion as he heard me speak my mind for what he believed to be the first time, the consequence of my words, thankfully, evading his notice.

Moments passed in a stunned silence; i looked over the balcony and into the night, wishing i could take the words back. And i could see Neji, his faced still showing almost absolute confusion.

Then, "You know you're very serious as well?"

I started as he brought that up; it was true, even if i never thought, let alone, admitted it. Now that i think back, there were not many times where i had laughed and enjoyed myself so freely as others around me.

"Fine. If you promise to be more light-hearted, so will I," I said, without stuttering because i really wasn't not thinking of what i was saying. I only noticed the frutility of this promise after i said it, but if he believed it, he could live the rest of his life better.

He nodded, with a smile. "Okay. Shake on it," he said as he raised his hand. I hesitated, though. But the darkness seemed to cloak my arms, so I raised mine as well, but kept the side with my palm facing more towards the ground, and we shook hands.

I was just about to take my hand away and breath a sigh of relief, when his grip tightened, and I felt my hand being turned upward.

The moonlight reflected on my one of my only secrets, one I had managed to keep hidden for so long. Scars, some pale and some bright red, those cut recently, stood out brightly on my arm. Luckily, it was my right hand, and had less cuts, but I could still feel his piercing gaze staring at them.

Tensing my muscles, I ripped my arm from his grip, bringing it close to my chest, and stumbling back a couple feet.

I felt his gaze find my face, but I refused to meet it. Instead, I stared out into the woods, hoping that this was a dream and I would soon wake.

"Do-don't te-tell," I whispered, my voice echoing across the silent night and my stutter returning. "Pl-please,"

He stared, looking like he was about to say something. But no words left his lips.

Minutes passed, and I finally looked at him head on. On his face, he held a look of utmost concentration, and slowly, his lips parted and words took form. "Let me see your other arm," he asked, he voice as calmed and controlled as always.

Again, I hesitated. I didn't want to risk this getting out, but I had waited for so long to tell someone about this, that I hated my life. That my arms were a canvas for feelings i had kept hidden for so long

"Will you promise not to tell anyone?" I asked cautiously, indecision still tearing apart my mind and my heart.

"If you let me see both your arms, I will tell no one," he responded. And I couldn't help but trust him.

Slowly, I uncurled my hands, and held them out in front of me, two years of cuts still showing fresh.

He wrapped his fingers around my wrists, and I felt myself flinch slightly as so close a contact. But his grip was tender, and I relaxed.

My eyes wandered while he inspected my wrists, and I found myself staring at him. Feelings buried inside me bubbled; yes I loved him, more than anyone else. But he could never know, could never love me back. He was too reasonable; he would never love a cousin younger than him. And so I let a small sigh out as the one-sided love beat in my chest.

I only just noticed as he let my hands drop, only just noticed as he turned to face the darkness. But I did notice a small, red light beeping in a few second intervals inside.

Suddenly, I felt warm hands place themselves on my cheeks, and I looked up to see his face inches away from mine. I barely had time to utter a small "what?" before his lips met mine. My eyes grew wide as he kissed me, and I felt, for a few seconds, that maybe he really did love me.

Our lips parted, my eyes still wide and staring.

"Hinata," he whispered, for there was no need to talk any louder as our faces were still so close. "Hinata, I love you more than I should love any cousin," he said, and I almost reached up and kissed him back.

But I didn't; instead, I replied with venom in my voice, "How could you?"

* * *

**omgosh cliff hanger!! why does she not accept the one she loves!! ok, so yeah...there is a second chapter becausei had this already written out, but if you want anymore,...well maybe...but it will take a lot to persuade me to continue a story..im very lazy...thanks for reading!! **

loves,

animeme220


	2. My Treatment

YAY SECOND CHAPTER!! yeah know what? just enjoy!

He stared at me, eyes wide as i pushed away from him, his hands falling limply to his side as what looked like torment flashed across his face for the briefest of instants.

I walked inside the door, to where the flashing light lay. My hands reached out, and my eyes saw what I had expected to be there; a video camera, focused right where him and I had just stood, recording.

I stopped the feed, took out the tape, and walked back outside the open, glass doors. Tears stained my face as I walked towards him. I shoved the video into his hands as my heart broke into two pieces, tears still falling from my eyes.

"Hinata," I heard him whisper as I stalked down the stairs onto the lawn, walking towards the front of the house. But my feet felt like jelly, and I wanted to fall down then and there and cry to my heart's content. But then I remembered; to the left lay a wooden block, with about fifteen or twenty knives sticking out of it.

The knives could give me pain, block out the memory of what had happened, if only for a while. But a while was all I needed to get myself back together again.

Slowly, I forced my feet to walk towards the wooden block. I could hear him calling my name in the background, but I didn't care; I just needed my escape.

Reaching up, I pulled to be what I thought was the sharpest knife out, and I walked over to the fence. On the other side lied an open patch of grass, with a swinging bench facing the woods, overlooking the small field.

I quickly jumped over, sitting down and leaning against the gate as I felt the tears roll off my cheeks, and rubber of the handle from the knife in my left hand. I did not notice the soft _whoosh_ as silent feet also jumped over the fence, landing about fifteen feet away, hidden in shadows.

Minutes passed before I felt in enough control to begin "my treatment", as I called it. My left hand rose over my right forearm, the glint of steal shining for just a second. Placing the cold metal against my arm, I pushed down until I felt pain, then dragged it across my arm. A gasp escaped my lips as the pain racked my body, quickly turning to pleasure.

I placed the knife against my skin, preparing for a second cut, when I felt the knife torn from my fingers.

Looking up, I saw him, sitting right in front of me, his eyes staring first at my hand, then at me, then at the knife.

"What do I have to do to prove I love you?" he whispered, and I could hear pain in his voice. "I'll cut myself for you. Watch."

And sure enough, he raised his right arm above his left, slicing open a deep, bloody gash. This time I could see the pain etched so clearly on his face, but he did not utter one complaint.

I was stunned silent; I couldn't move, and I could barely breath. Did he really love me? I couldn't tell. But never did I want to see him in pain.

Reaching across, I took his hand that held the knife, watched as his gaze met mine. I smiled, reassuring him that he did not need to cause himself pain to prove he loved me.

Slowly, his lips met mine again, and I embraced it, closing my eyes and throwing my arms behind his head. I loved him; and whether this was a joke or not, I was going to take advantage of it.


End file.
